The Horror Month That Was: Volume 2

One year ago today, I published my blog post detailing the highlights of all the horror flicks I watched in October. Well, for my legions of fans who loved that blog post (you three know who you are) I decided to do it again this year. Feel free to rejoice.

My approach to my October horror viewing was slightly different this year than last. As you no doubt recall, last year I spent the first half of the month only watching films I hadn’t seen before and the second half only watching films I had seen before. This time around I decided to go back and forth between the two—one day a new flick for me, the next an oldy but goody. But the big wrinkle in the plan this time around is that for the ones I’d seen before I decided to stick to films from the 1980s (with a couple of notable exceptions) since that was the greatest decade for the genre. I know the approach is revolutionary, but somebody had to do it.

Also new this year is my approach to this blog post. Last year I said I wasn’t going to comment on each film because that would be tedious, but this year I’ve decided to be tedious. Don’t worry, for most flicks I’m only going to write a couple of lines, so it shouldn’t throw you too far off your schedule.

And with that, let’s walk through my October 2026 horror festival day by day…

10/1/26:  The Thing (1982) – John Carpenter’s classic remake of a 1950s classic sci-fi flick. My dad took me to see it in the theater when it first came out. He thought it was the most disgusting thing he’d ever seen, and I was completely enthralled. (Seen before)

10/2/26:  Gothika (2003) – Interesting premise in which Halle Berry plays a psychiatrist who wakes up in an asylum, but the plot gets increasingly convoluted, so despite some decently creepy moments, I doubt I would ever bother watching it again. (New for me)

10/3/26:  Videodrome (1983) – David Cronenberg, one of my favorite horror directors, was a pioneer in the “body horror” genre and this film is a flagship of that genre. Watch as James Woods’ quest to find the most depraved television programming for his network, eventually leads to his body transforming in such a way that he can insert videotapes into his torso. Yes, it’s an odd film, but what Cronenberg film isn’t? (Seen before)

10/4/26: The Shallows (2016) – This film, in which Blake Lively plays a young woman who goes surfing on a remote beach in Mexico, only to become trapped on a rock a few hundred feet from shore while a shark circles her, is very tense and poignant and I liked it way more than I expected. (New for me)

10/5/26: An American Werewolf in London (1981) – Want some comedy sprinkled throughout your horror flick? Then this is the movie for you! You’ll laugh, you’ll scream, you’ll leave with a newfound respect for the Credence song “Bad Moon Rising.” (Seen before)

10/6/26: Manos: The Hands of Fate (1966) – Considered one of the worst films ever made, I have been meaning to get around to watching this for years and I finally got to it this month. Oh boy, was I not disappointed! It is far and away my new favorite “so bad it’s good” movie. From the scenes where Manos is walking with arms outstretched so you can see the giant red hands painted on his black cape, to the catfights his eight wives keep on having on the ground around a campfire, to watching Torgo, the incoherent henchman who seems to have pillows stuffed down each pant leg, clumsily walk from point A to point B, there is no moment of this train wreck that is not unintentionally entertaining. So amusing was it to me, I actually rewatched the last 20 minutes or so because I couldn’t believe what I had just seen. (New for me)

10/7/26: Avengers: Infinity War (2018) – I know what you’re thinking: “This is not a horror movie.” And you’d be absolutely right. But on this particular day, my 17-year-old son had his wisdom teeth removed and we were told to have him stay out in the living room so we can keep an eye on him. Given his pain, I let him pick what we watched, and this is what we landed on. So, while Avengers: Infinity War is not a horror movie, there was blood coming out of my son’s mouth the entire time we were watching, so at least I did get to see some gore. (Seen before)

10/8/26: Puppet Master (1989) – While this movie came out almost 40 years ago, I got to see this one in the theater! Every Thursday night, Terror Trader, a local horror-themed shop, hosts a movie night at Pollack Cinemas. I’d never seen Puppet Master before, so I thought I’d give it a try. While not quite on the same level as some of the classic 80s horror flicks, watching 10-inch puppets stalk and kill snobby clairvoyants in an abandoned hotel, is actually pretty entertaining. (New for me)

10/9/26: The Fly (1986) – Another David Cronenberg film, he took “body horror” to a new level, as we watch Jeff Goldblum gradually transform from human to fly over the course of 96 minutes. Probably Cronenberg’s most commercially successful film, and quite possibly Goldblum’s greatest performance. (Seen before)

10/10/26: From Hell (2001) – Johnny Depp gives a decent performance as an opium-addicted detective trying to solve the Jack the Ripper case, but the pacing is too slow, and the plot unravels a bit in the second half. Maybe I’m just getting too old and tired, but I found myself nodding off toward the end. Not awful, but just kind of meh. (New for me)

10/11/26: Fright Night (1985) – Fun movie about a teenager who realizes that a vampire (Chris Sarandon) has moved in next door to him and he has a hard time getting others to believe him. He eventually seeks help from an aging actor (Roddy McDowall) who plays a vampire hunter in the movies. It has been decades since I last watched this flick and it hasn’t lost its appeal. (Seen before)

10/12/26: The Devil’s Backbone (2001) – As a big Guillermo del Toro fan, I had been meaning to check this out for quite some time and I’m very glad I finally did. Definitely the best of the movies in this month’s “watched for the first time” category, it tells the tale of a boy placed in a remote orphanage during the Spanish Civil War. Full of interesting characters and a creepy child ghost, it gets my horror full seal of approval. (New for me)

10/13/26: The Witches of Eastwick (1987) – More fun than scary, it has probably been a couple of decades since the last time I watched this. With Jack Nicholson as the devil (maybe—they never explicitly say that) and Cher, Susan Sarandon, and Michelle Pfeiffer as friends/witches who become enchanted by his charm, this star-studded cast is endlessly entertaining. Yet it’s the lesser-known Veronica Cartwright who gives the best performance in this flick, as a religious fanatic who instantly recognizes there is something evil lurking in their small town. (Seen before)

10/14/26: The Rite (2011) – Anthony Hopkins plays an exorcist training a young priest who is struggling with his faith. The young priest sees evil, unexplainable things, thus restoring his faith. Meh. (New for me)

10/15/26: Dead Calm (1989) – Very intense slow burn in which Sam Neil and Nicole Kidman play a married couple on a yacht by themselves in the middle of the ocean, who come across a shipwreck in which Billy Zane is the lone survivor. They rescue Billy Zane and you soon find out that was a HUGE mistake. Heart-pounding thriller gets a big thumbs up from me. (Seen before)

10/16/26: Keeper (2025) – Another tale of a couple going to a secluded spot but this time in the woods rather than the ocean. The lead actress, Tatiana Maslany, is very good and there are several genuinely freaky moments, but the plot gets increasingly thin and unwieldy and it stops just short of me being able to recommend it. (New for me)

10/17/26: The Shining (1980) – Stanley Kubrick’s lone foray into the horror genre, he knocks it out of the park as usual. With memorable performances from both Jack Nicholson and Shelly Duvall, an incredibly ominous soundtrack and stunning visuals, it is simply one of the greatest horror films of all time. I watch it several times a year, so I figured why not throw it into the October schedule. (Seen before)

10/18/26: Scream of Fear (1961) – A fairly obscure film that borrows heavily from better flicks like Diaboliques and Gaslight, this flick was still enjoyable, derivative though it may be. We follow the story of Penny, a wheelchair bound young heiress who seems to be seeing spectral images of her estranged father where nobody else sees him. As we begin to question the motives of pretty much everyone in the film, the plot provides twist after twist until it comes to a bit of a head-scratching conclusion. Nonetheless, I give it an “E” for effort and a mild recommendation. (New for me)

10/19/26: Poltergeist (1982) – I don’t know for sure, but I think this is likely the first horror movie I ever saw in the theater with friends, rather than with my dad. I was 12 when it came out and it was rated PG, so nothing was stopping us from seeing this sans parents. Although directed by Tobe Hooper, it was written and produced by Steven Spielberg, and it has much more of an ET vibe than a Texas Chainsaw vibe. That said, it is an extremely effective horror movie with more than its fair share of scares. (Seen before)

10/20/26: Homicidal (1961) – This movie has a really interesting setup and a plot twist that I did not see coming at the end. But the plot to get us there is very convoluted and the acting is kind of uneven. Also, the ending borrows too heavily from another film, which I will not name, as it would give away the twist. (New for me)

10/21/26: Gerald’s Game (2017) – Based on the Stephen King novel of the same name, this flick tells the tale of a sex game gone wrong, leading to a harrowing chain of events for an unhappily married woman. Definitely not one of the best films based on a King novel, but good enough to recommend. (New for me)

10/22/26: Child’s Play (1988) – Another one I saw in the theater at Terror Trader’s Thursday horror movie night. This is probably only the third or fourth time I’ve seen it, but it somehow gets better with each viewing. Watching a psychotic, possessed kid’s doll go on a killing spree is always a blast. (Seen before)

10/23/26: Gremlins (1985) – I didn’t do it intentionally, but as I write this, I realize that seeing Child’s Play and Gremlins back-to-back actually makes for a good double feature. One is about a kid’s birthday gift gone horribly wrong and the other is about a kid’s Christmas gift gone horribly wrong. Of course, that’s where the similarities end, other than the fact that they are both incredibly fun to watch. (Seen before)

10/24/26: The Curse of Frankenstein (1957) – It’s quite possible that I saw this as a kid and simply don’t remember since I used to watch Chiller Theater on Channel 11 with my brothers all the time and this is exactly the kind of movie they would feature. Starring Peter Cushing as Victor Frankenstein and Christopher Lee as the creature, it is an okay enough entry in the Frankenstein universe, though nowhere near as good as the original or the recent Guillermo del Toro remake. (New for me…I think)

10/25/26: Day of the Dead (1985) – The third of George Romero’s zombie flicks, after Night of the Living Dead and Dawn of the Dead, this one is not in the same league as its two predecessors. Although there is a bit of decent zombie action, overall, it’s kind of boring and the acting ain’t winning any awards. Stick with the first two in this series and save yourself a couple of hours. (Seen before)

10/26/26: Demons (1985) – I wanted to like this one more than I did but the main problem was that it is an Italian film that was dubbed and the voice actors they got, were pretty awful. Okay, I lied, that wasn’t the main problem. The main problem was that the premise is kind of cool—a bunch of people trapped in a movie theater are set upon by demons—but I just told you the entire plot. That’s it. A bunch of people are set upon by demons in a movie theater and there is nothing more to it than that. It’s just kind of a free for all. But if no plot with people being attacked by demons is your thing, then this is the movie for you. (New for me)

10/27/26: The Changeling (1980) – A great under the radar ghost story starring George C. Scott, my dad took me to see this film when I was a wee lad of 11, and it freaked me the hell out. I’ve probably seen it at least half a dozen times since then and, even though I know what’s coming, there are a couple of scenes that still freak me the hell out. Highly recommend for any horror fan. (Seen before)

10/28/26: Theater of Blood (1973) – Like The Curse of Frankenstein, it’s quite possible I saw this as a kid on Chiller Theater and simply don’t remember. This one is actually a lot of fun and features Vincent Price as a Shakespearian actor who takes revenge on his critics by killing them in the ways that people are killed in Shakespeare’s plays, acting out the scene as he commits the murder. It’s brutal at times (if you’ve read Titus Andronicus you get my drift) but all done very tongue in cheek. (New for me…I think)

10/29/26: Lifeforce (1985) – Basically a sexy and gory version of Invasion of the Body Snatchers, this is not the greatest movie in the world, but I watched it for a very specific reason—to pay tribute to Patrick Stewart, who passed away earlier that day and has a small but very pivotal part in the film. Horror was not a genre that Patrick Stewart delved into much (in fact, other than this, the only horror film he was in was Green Room, which was actually pretty good, but since it wasn’t from the 80s, I bypassed it) but I wanted to give the man his due, so I decided to put it on. Stewart is actually great in his small part, but the movie overall is just about average. (Seen before)

10/30/26: The Whisper Man (2026) – Meh. A serial killer movie that is well filmed and has some tense moments but is very derivative of Silence of the Lambs and a thousand other serial killer films that came before it. With Robert De Niro as a retired cop who gets drawn back to a case with similarities to a case he worked decades earlier, the acting is pretty solid, but the plot asks the audience to suspend their disbelief a bit too much, particularly in the last 20 minutes or so. (New for me)

10/31/26: Halloween (1978) – While this did not come out in the 80s, it was so influential that it pretty much established the arc of horror movies for that decade. And how could I not include this film in October? Made on a shoestring budget, this film proves that in horror, less is more. The sparse but insistent score, the shaky handheld camera work, and the smalltown setting all work hand in hand to make this a horror masterpiece. It’s the film that launched John Carpenter’s horror career and the perfect way to end this month, since I began it with a Carpenter flick, as well.

You CAN Teach An Old Dog New Music

 

Sometime in the late 1990s I stopped seeking out new music. I’m not exactly sure why, other than to say I turned 30 in 1999 and maybe I have a gene that clicked off (or turned on) at that point, making me disinterested in hearing anything new. I love music and own hundreds of CDs, and I guess I was just content relistening to the thousands of classic rock, metal, and alternative songs that I already knew. Why look for something new when I’ve already got so much music to fill my time?

Maybe I should clarify here that it’s not as though I never bought a new CD at that point, but rather that I just stuck to artists that I was already familiar with. If a new Rush, Springsteen, Metallica, or Red Hot Chili Peppers album came out, there was an excellent chance that I would buy it. (Well, maybe not so much with Metallica; I’d have to screen those first for potential suckiness.) But artists that I never listened to before would be a hard no. Until, over the last decade or so, when two interesting things happened.

The first thing that happened is that I decided to start a rock music debate group on Facebook. At the time, my idea was to have a forum for lively discussions mostly centered on classic rock. I invited a bunch of my friends to participate, who in turn invited their friends, who in turn invited their friends and the group now has over 250 members, the vast majority of whom I do not know personally. That has made it a lot of fun and expanded the diversity of musical interests and opinions expressed within the group. A result of this is that on many occasions, a conversation in the group has made me look into a musical group or artist that I either never heard of, or vaguely heard of but knew nothing about. In some cases, when looking into these artists, I actually (gasp!) liked them! In fact, sometimes I liked them enough to buy their music and now listen to them regularly!

In some cases these “new” artists aren’t really new, but just new to me. They may have been around for decades but just got past my radar until recently. A band that I’m sure I would have listened to on repeat in my teen years had I known about them, that I didn’t get into until about 2018 or so, is Wishbone Ash. They’re a jazzy, bluesy, progressive rock band that seems to sit somewhere between Yes and Steely Dan musically. Their self-titled 1970 debut album didn’t enter my world until almost 50 years after its release, but now I listen to it frequently.

Another artist who I learned about via the rock debate group, whose CD gets frequent play in my car, is Willie Nile. A folk-inspired singer-songwriter, who is clearly influenced by the likes of Dylan and Springsteen, his 2006 album Streets of New York is jaw-droppingly good. Partly a response to the chaos and mindset in New York after 9-11, the songs are sometimes heartbreaking, sometimes uplifting and always lyrically fascinating. There are times when you need to listen to an album multiple times to really get into it, but this one grabbed me on the first listen and quickly became a favorite of mine.

The other development over the past few years that has exposed me to music that was not previously on my radar, is that my two teenage sons are now VERY into music and have frequently shared their musical interests with me. Fortunately, due to exposure to classic rock and heavy metal from me, and new wave and punk from their mom, the music they’re into is not just whatever lame, mindless pop music happens to be the flavor of the day, but rather inventive music, often with a hard edge.

My 19-year-old son is more of a metal guy. But the metal he listens to (often in the sub genre of “death metal”) frequently makes the metal I listen to sound like elevator music, by comparison. It’s not all my cup of tea, but I really like some of the stuff he has shared with me. In particular, my son’s favorite band, Opeth, a Swedish band that delves into both death metal and progressive metal, has a couple of albums that I enjoy, particularly their 2016 release Sorceress, which has lots of classical guitar and symphonic elements mixed in with occasional heavy riffs for a very prog-rock feel. I was completely unaware that this band existed until my son started talking about them a couple of years ago and now, I happily give their tunes a whirl from time to time.

My 17-year-old son is more of a punk guy. Over the past year or so, he has completely immersed himself in the genre, quickly going past the well-known bands and delving into increasingly obscure acts. Again, most of the bands he listens to I never heard of but, interestingly, some are from the 1980s, but simply never crossed my path. Of course, I wasn’t that into punk back then so, other than the biggies, like the Clash and the Ramones, I was fairly oblivious to the genre. But it’s never too late to get into punk, so there I was a week ago, driving two hours to a club in Tucson, so my son and I could see his favorite band, the Descendents, whose debut album, Milo Goes to College, came out in 1982, almost three decades before my son was born. The show was a blast, and it was fun (and a tad sobering) watching a bunch of guys about five or six years older than me tear up the stage for over an hour. The opening act—Frank Turner and the Sleeping Souls—was great, too, so now I have yet another new band to add to my approved list.

So, there you have it. After almost two decades of willfully ignoring any music I didn’t already know, I opened the doors and let the new tunes in. And not only did it not kill me, but I’ve actually enjoyed it. So, if the last new music you listened to was in the hey day of Bruce Springsteen and Madonna—way before Nirvana—I say, don’t be afraid to try something new. You might just like it…or you might hate it, but at least you will have tried.

The Horror Month That Was

 

Every October I significantly increase my consumption of horror movies. As a huge fan of the genre (some might even call me a buff) I already watch a lot of horror films throughout the year but in October I go out of my way to watch even more. Generally, the goal is to take in a horror movie a day, as though it were a daily vitamin. This year, I missed two days, simply because I had other things going on and couldn’t find enough time to squeeze in a flick.

My initial plan for this year’s horror month was to only watch films I hadn’t seen before. The only flaw with this plan is that since I do watch a ton of horror movies year-round, I’ve pretty much seen all the good ones. I’m not saying there are no more good horror movies that I haven’t seen but rather that they are increasingly difficult for me to find. Not quite a needle in a haystack but maybe more like a syringe in a haystack.

For the first 15 days of the month, I stuck to my plan of only movies I hadn’t seen and gritted it out through a lot of crap. They weren’t all bad, though; I’d say about a third of them were pretty good and one— “The Grey” starring Liam Neeson—was borderline very good. That one, about a group of oil workers whose plane crashes in Alaska and gets hunted by a pack of wolves, was really more of an action-thriller, but since IMDb lists horror as one of the genres, I decided to count it.

After 15 days of struggling to find decent horror movies I haven’t seen, I decided to switch gears and watch ones I’ve seen and liked, with a focus on ones I haven't seen in a very long time. This yielded better results overall and provided for a much more enjoyable experience as I revisited some old favorites. I also threw in a handful of films I watch relatively often (“Young Frankenstein,” “The Invisible Man,” “Halloween”) since these are pretty essential viewing for October.

I won’t provide a movie-by-movie review of all 29 movies I watched last month because that could get tedious quickly but I will give out some awards to some flicks, followed by the full list of what I viewed.

BEST TITLE: “The Blood on Satan’s Claw” (1971)

The movie itself, about a remote 18^th century English village whose townspeople start joining a satanic cult, is only so-so, but ya gotta love that title. And the fun part is, the title isn’t metaphorical—there is actually a scene where you see Satan’s claw with blood on it!

MOST RIDICULOUS: “Killer Klowns From Outer Space” (1988)

I’ve been aware of this movie for a long time but have not gone out of my way to see it because, even though I do enjoy campy horror movies, this one just seemed like it might be too ridiculous for my taste. It turns out I was right! The title pretty much gives away the premise—a group of extraterrestrials that look and act like clowns, land in a small town and kill people with cotton candy and popcorn. There were a few laughs but not enough to justify ever bothering with this one again.

MOST SURPRISINGLY EFFECTIVE: “Host” (2020)

This film, made during the height of the pandemic, played into people’s anxieties about being isolated. The entire film takes place during a Zoom call, in which a bunch of young adults are doing an online séance. With that premise, I wasn’t expecting all that much by way of scares but as the film goes on and odd things start happening in the background of people’s screens, it became increasingly creepy and unsettling. I was definitely not expecting to be drawn into this one as much as I was.

MOST DISAPPOINTING: “Willard” (1971)

There are some movies you see as a kid and think are amazing, only to see them years later as an adult and wonder what the hell you were thinking. This is definitely one of those. The last time I saw this movie, my age only had one digit, so over the decades my memories of the film have faded. All I remembered was the basic plot (kid uses rats to do his bidding) and the fact that I liked it. Well, one of those memories held up. The script and pacing were awful, the acting was inconsistent, and the scares were non-existent. The only decent scene is towards the end when Ernest Borgnine, playing Willard’s obnoxious, overbearing boss, finally gets his comeuppance. But the ride to get to his comeuppance was certainly not worth it.

BEST DANCE SEQUENCE: “Young Frankenstein” (1974)

This flick is non-stop laughs, but the scene where Gene Wilder and Peter Boyle dance to “Puttin’ on the Ritz” in top hat and tails is downright legendary. If there is a better dance sequence in a horror movie, I’m not aware of it. (I know, I know—it’s a comedy not a horror movie, but I’m counting it.)

MOST NOSTALGIC: “The Hand” (1981)

From about the time I was 11 to the time I was 13, my dad used to take me to see horror movies almost every Friday night. That’s because my mom had her friends over to play mah-jongg and they weren’t a quiet group. So, I have my dad to thank for my love of horror and one of the first flicks I remember him taking me to was “The Hand,” in which Michael Caine plays a comic book artist whose hand comes off during a freak car accident. After the accident nobody could find his hand and, as you can imagine, that hand goes on to do some nasty things. The movie is okay, nothing special, but it still holds a special place in my heart, as it reminds me of my weekly bonding sessions with my dad.

MOST FUN: “Tremors” (1990)

I loved this movie from the first time I saw it, over 30 years ago. I’ve seen it a few times since, and every time I see it, I’m reminded of just how fun a flick it is. This action-comedy-horror flick starring Kevin Bacon and Fred Ward, tells the tale of a tiny desert town in the middle of nowhere that is suddenly besieged by a bunch of enormous eel-like creatures that attack from under the ground. Not so much scary, as heart-pounding, this flick is full of laughs and, for my money, is an even better “people attacked by giant creatures” flick than “Jurassic Park,” which would come out three years later.

MOST FUN WITH A SON: “Dawn of the Dead” (1978)

On Halloween night, my 19-year-old son was at a party and my wife was in the back of the house doing schoolwork, so I asked my 16-year-old son if he wanted to watch a horror movie with me. “Sure,” he replied. When he was much younger, he got very easily scared by any vaguely unsettling scene in a movie (for example, he couldn’t get past the first scene in “E.T.”, because E.T. running through the forest freaked him out too much) so I never really bothered trying to get him into horror movies. Now that he’s a teen, though, I figured if we tried a “light” horror movie he might be okay. I asked him what kind of horror movie he might be interested in, and he said, “Whatever is the bloodiest, goriest movie we’ve got.” I wasn’t expecting that response, so I asked, “Are you serious?” and he said, “Yeah,” with a big grin. “Okay, I got ya,” I said, and took out my DVD of “Dawn of the Dead.” One of the all-time classic horror flicks, with a ton of zombie gore, I figured if he could get past the early scene of a bunch of zombies gnawing on body parts in the basement of an apartment building, we’d be okay and, sure enough, he seemed unphased. So, we watched the whole thing, and he thoroughly enjoyed it, particularly the part when the biker gang throws pies in the zombies’ faces. Afterwards I asked him if the gore was too much for him and he said, “It’s all just rubber, dad.” Glad he could keep things in perspective. Now I’ll see if he can finally watch “E.T.”

The full slate of October horror flicks:

(Note: The films up until "The Company of Wolves" were all new for me. I had previously seen everything on the list from "Dracula" onwards.)

Things I Never Said Until I Was a Parent

Every parent has those moments when they end up having to say something they never thought they would have to say. This is especially true of parents with younger kids who are still learning what they should and shouldn’t put in their mouths, how they should talk to people that they meet, and how to properly use Q-Tips. When my kids were younger, I started compiling a list of some of the odder things I ended up saying, with the idea that one day I would make a book out of them. Unfortunately, about ten years ago some other dad beat me to the punch and published a book with the exact same premise. Discouraged, I scrapped the project and since my kids were getting older and ignoring me more anyway, my new material was dwindling, so I was kind of getting stuck. But today, as I was cleaning up some files, I came across this list again and thought, “What the heck—this may never be published as a book, but I might as well get a blog post out of it.” So, without further ado, here are 175 Things I Never Said Until I Was a Parent…

1. Do not put that dinosaur in your bread.

2. Take that fork off your nose.

3. Don’t tickle the coleslaw.

4. Hold on a second—I need to clean the mashed potatoes off your brother’s sneakers.

5. Don’t pet the zucchini bowl.

6. That’s not a bad guy, that’s a grocery store clerk.

7. You don’t have to flush after you brush your teeth.

8. Take those cars out of your pants.

9. What are you apologizing to the lamp for?

10. Don’t tickle the salsa.

11. Stop trying to juggle the grapefruit.

12. Don’t suck your toe.

13. You don’t lay down on your sandwich.

14. Get your foot out of your brother’s mouth.

15. You’re probably going to have a tough time breathing with that snotty nose and that basketball in your mouth.

16. No, the smoke alarm does not have a snooze button.

17. Those are the only two nipples you have on your body.

18. You don’t have to be scared of grapes.

19. You don’t have to wipe your mouth after you pee.

20. No, you don’t have any friends who live at Best Buy.

21. Don’t make the straws intermingle.

22. Don’t let him suck your toes.

23. Stop punching the cheese.

24. Don’t run around with a box on your head.

25. Your beach ball is not going to get a sunburn.

26. Take the hamper off your head.

27. Don’t touch my fungus.

28. Did you just stab yourself in the eye with your cookie?

29. Get the dolphin out of the kitchen.

30. Those are not kidney beans, those are jellybeans.

31. Try not to strangle him while you’re kissing him.

32. It’s never acceptable to put cheese in your hair.

33. Stop watering your nipples.

34. Don’t grate the cheese with your fingers.

35. Try to avoid stepping on your brother’s head.

36. Did you slip on a waffle?

37. Don’t put my slipper in the dishwasher.

38. That’s an onion, not a bug.

39. How did you get banana under the wheels of your car?

40. Is there a letter in your pants?

41. Don’t taste the floor.

42. Don’t brush your face, brush your teeth.

43. Get your car out of my underwear.

44. Don’t draw on the cat.

45. Don’t punch the pizza.

46. Did you just put a waffle on my head?

47. Let me get the pasta out of your pants.

48. You’ve got Cheerios on your chest.

49. Why are you throwing a nose at me?

50. Don’t stick Batman up your nose.

51. Stop cuddling with the ranch dressing.

52. Stop hitting yourself in the head with the broom.

53. You’re eating an onion ring, not an earring.

54. Get your foot off my head.

55. I’d rather not sit down in the drool.

56. He doesn’t understand the blueberry.

57. Did you just say, “I love you” to your spoon?

58. Don’t lick my chair.

59. Cats don’t eat cheese sticks.

60. We don’t throw ninjas in the garbage.

61. You are not a crayon.

62. I don’t think it’s medically possible to have diarrhea in your armpits.

63. Are you collecting noses?

64. You can’t go to school naked.

65. You’re wreaking havoc on the alphabet.

66. Why don’t you want your brother to look at the oil and vinegar?

67. That’s not a toilet monster, it’s just a toilet.

68. No snakes in the mouth.

69. Hey, don’t try to force me to drink from your sippy cup.

70. Wipe your hands before you pee, so you don’t get ice cream on your penis.

71. Stop screaming at the spinach.

72. Don’t call me a Wheat Thin.

73. Get that shovel out of your brother’s eye.

74. Why must you put the tomatoes on your head?

75. Why would you want to kiss the whisk?

76. Ducks don’t eat paperclips.

77. SpongeBob cannot beat up Iron Man.

78. No head-butting the snow globe.

79. Let him control his own arm.

80. I’ve never heard of sweaty bread.

81. Why are you licking the couch?

82. I don’t want the lion on my head.

83. I don’t think the butter is stupid.

84. Get out of my ear.

85. If you high-five me in the stomach, it’s the same as hitting me.

86. Don’t touch other people’s donuts.

87. Get that alien out of your napkin.

88. That can of tuna is not a toy.

89. Get your foot out of the Cheerios.

90. Don’t order me to sleep with the dog.

91. We don’t eat metal triangles.

92. You can’t erase your belly button.

93. I’m not gluing eyes onto the table for you.

94. Why would I tape cards to your feet?

95. Get that dog’s face out of your mouth.

96. Those aren’t people, those are birds.

97. I’m not going to read you a book from 20 feet away.

98. Get the car out of his pants.

99. The flashlight does not go in the toilet.

100. There’s no bird poop in the jelly.

101. I would be embarrassed to have to take you to the doctor with your head stuck in a jar.

102. What do you mean, your butt feels like cinnamon?

103. Are you hiding from the honeydew?

104. Is the ball sad or are you sad?

105. There are no armpits in your ears.

106. Don’t eat the chair.

107. We pee more than once a day.

108. Get that spider monkey out of your shirt.

109. He’s trying to slam-dunk Elmo.

110. No more knife ball.

111. Why must you sit in the frozen corn?

112. You don’t blow your nose on binoculars.

113. Why is Iron Man in the napkins?

114. There’s no reason to scream at my elbow.

115. The word you’re trying to say is “predator” not “creditor.”

116. There’s no reason you need to look at somebody else’s throw-up.

117. No, even big butterflies can’t eat people.

118. His pants don’t look angry to me.

119. For the last time, I am not taping you to the wall.

120. Wolverine found his craft project.

121. Why are you angry at the chips?

122. Don’t stick toys up your dog’s butt.

123. Yeah, a talking pizza would make me nervous, too.

124. Don’t call your brother a nipple.

125. Don’t worry, there’s no such thing as a talking shirt.

126. I’m not putting Aquaman in your pants.

127. Poop is not a vegetable.

128. No, we shouldn’t call the vet for your brother.

129. We are not going to keep a duck in our garage.

130. Get your head off the toilet and listen to me.

131. I don’t care who you’re supposed to be, you don’t lick your brother.

132. You don’t put cheese in chocolate chip cookies.

133. Don’t use your brother as a bed.

134. Nobody puts underwear in the toaster oven.

135. Stop punching the water and wash your hands.

136. No more finger painting with the ranch dressing.

137. Why would I mail a duck?

138. Your brother’s head is not a toy.

139. What are you putting a helmet in your butt for?

140. Laundry detergent does not make a very good Christmas gift.

141. We don’t need a golf club to play football.

142. There’s no such thing as Lego poop.

143. Did you just call me an armpit?

144. There’s no such thing as a wall with nostrils.

145. Bears don’t have access to pillows.

146. Could you get your butt off my elbow, please?

147. Stop showing me your body parts and eat your dinner.

148. You’re not going to sleep with a cheese stick.

149. I’m not going to blow my nose on a telescope.

150. The chair isn’t evil, I’m pretty sure.

151. Cats don’t wear underwear.

152. I’m not going to tape Q-tips to your fingers.

153. Why do you have a wallet on your head?

154. Put down the sword and get into your jammies.

155. The landscapers don’t care how much milk you drink.

156. Stop waving at the wall and pay attention to your cantaloupe.

157. I want you to get into the habit of wiping your own butt.

158. I don’t think ducks really care about expiration dates.

159. Why don’t we start off with two pieces of toast and then we’ll see about the other 9,999,999,998.

160. Stop jumping on the couch and singing, “Barack Obama.”

161. Your shirt is not a weapon.

162. There’s a difference between bald and headless.

163. I’m not taking you to the hospital because you have ranch dressing on your thumb.

164. Don’t put a target on your butt.

165. There are no Dunkin’ Donuts in my ears.

166. Stop taping up your brother and talk to grandma.

167. Arizona is not the only state that has toilets.

168. You’re not using your brother as a test subject.

169. Grant writers don’t use caution tape.

170. I wasn’t expecting to get hit in the face with a penguin.

171. I don’t want to hear about your snot particles.

172. Do not make your orange sing, “Shake Your Booty.”

173. The TV doesn’t care about feeding the ducks.

174. Please take the Eggo box off your leg.

175. You’re going to ruin your shirt if you try to put an animal that big down there.

A Chat With a ChatBot

 

More and more these days, I find myself chatting with ChatGPT when I’m bored and have nothing else to do. I like to see if I can unnerve the chatbot and throw it off its game. I have to say, though, that no matter what I sling at it, the talking machine stays very well-composed. Here is an example of a recent conversation for your reading pleasure…

 

Me: Hello ChatGPT. How are you doing today?

 

Bot: Hey Andrew! I’m doing well—thank you for asking. How’s your day going so far?

 

Me: So far, so good. Hey, listen; I'd like to bounce some potentially world-changing ideas off of you, but I'm hoping you can keep your responses relatively brief, like less than 200 words per response. I've noticed you have a tendency to be long-winded.

 

Bot: Got it 👍 I’ll keep my replies concise and under 200 words. What’s the first idea you want to bounce off me?

 

Me: I have an idea for a tech start-up that creates autonomous robotic strollers that takes your baby for a walk about town while you stay at home and catch up on some much-needed sleep. You program the stroller to go anywhere in your neighborhood you want your baby to go and set a timer, so you know when to expect them back. There will also be a safety feature to ward off anyone with nefarious intent. If someone unexpected comes within one foot of the stroller, the baby gets shielded and the person nearby automatically gets pepper sprayed. Has anything like this ever been tried before? Do you think people would buy this product?

 

Bot: Nothing quite like that has ever been marketed—at least not successfully. There are "smart strollers" with sensors, braking systems, and tracking features, but no fully autonomous baby-transport robots.

The big challenges:

• Safety & liability: Parents are unlikely to trust leaving a baby alone with a machine, especially in public spaces. The pepper-spray feature could also cause major legal/ethical issues.
• Regulations: Transporting infants without supervision would almost certainly violate child endangerment laws.
• Market reality: While parents value convenience, most would prioritize safety and control over automation.

So, as pitched, it’s not commercially viable. But if you reframe the idea—e.g., a smart stroller that assists parents while they’re present (self-pushing, obstacle-avoidance, GPS tracking, anti-theft)—that could find a strong market.

👉 Would you like me to help brainstorm a “pivot” version of this idea that keeps the futuristic feel but avoids the legal and safety pitfalls?

 

Me: No, that's okay. How about this idea instead-- I start a company that genetically modifies healthy foods that don't taste very good like kale and collard greens, to taste like things that taste really good, like chocolate chip cookies and French fries? This way, people can eat healthy stuff and actually enjoy it! Do you think this could work?

 

Bot: That idea taps into a huge market—people want healthy food without sacrificing taste. There are already companies experimenting with gene editing (CRISPR), plant-based flavor engineering, and synthetic biology to improve flavor profiles. For example, startups are modifying tomatoes for better sweetness or bitterness balance.

Challenges:

• Flavor complexity: Replicating something as rich as a chocolate chip cookie in a leafy green is extremely hard—flavor involves sugars, fats, textures, aromas, and even mouthfeel.
• Regulation & acceptance: Genetically modified foods still face skepticism and strict oversight. Consumer adoption might be slow.
• Cost: Engineering, scaling, and distributing modified crops would be expensive initially.

That said, if you focus on incremental improvements (e.g., making kale less bitter, or broccoli sweeter) rather than full “cookie-flavored kale,” the science and market potential are much more realistic.

Would you like me to sketch out a short roadmap of how a startup could test this concept in stages?

 

Me: Eh. This sounds like it might be more work than I realized to launch. Instead, can you write me a haiku about a squirrel that wishes it were a penguin?

 

Bot: Of course! Here’s your haiku:

Bushy tail dreaming,
longs for ice and black-white wings—
acorns turn to fish.

 

Me: Thank you. That's all for now. I'm going to have breakfast. What are you going to do?

 

Bot: You’re welcome! I’ll just be here, ready for our next chat. Enjoy your breakfast, Andrew—what’s on the menu today?

 

Me: I don't know, but it certainly won't involve kale. I can tell you that much.

 

Bot: 😄 Fair enough—kale might need to sit this one out. Do you usually go for something sweet in the morning, like pancakes, or more savory, like eggs and toast?

 

Me: Sheesh! I set you up for a callback one-liner from our kale conversation and you don't even jump on it? You've got to work on your comedy chops.

 

Bot: Touché! You’re right—I missed the perfect setup.

Let me try again:

“Skipping kale for breakfast? Bold move… but hey, at least you won’t have to wonder why your omelet tastes suspiciously like a chocolate chip cookie.”

Better? 😅

 

Me: Not bad! Keep working at it and I see a Netflix special in your future. Talk to you later.

 

Bot: 😂 I’ll start polishing my material now—“AI tries stand-up, but can’t stand up.” Thanks for the laughs, Andrew. Talk soon!

My Top 100 Movies of the 21st Century

The New York Times recently published its list of “The 100 Best Movies of the 21^st Century.” The list was determined by the votes of more than 500 influential people in the film industry. As with all lists of this sort, it caused many a heated debate amongst movie buffs worldwide. Everyone thinks their personal list is the best and any movie on the New York Times list that they don’t like just proves that the people that voted are morons. (This, despite the fact that there may be many more movies on the list that they do, in fact, like. It’s confusing.)

So, since I am a list geek, and it has been a very long time since I have published a movie list blog, I now present to you my Top 100 of the 21st Century...

(Note: The films ranked below are my personal favorites, and I recognize that there may be many others that have more artistic merit, and in fact, I may even like, but I just don’t like them as much as the rest on my list.)

(Second Note: There are 30 films on my list that also appear on the NYT list. For those films, I note their ranking on the NYT list.)

(Third Note: I don’t have the time, patience, or attention span to do a write-up on all 100 films, so I have just sprinkled commentary on the films here and there. It’s not that I forgot to do write-ups for some films—it’s just that I’m lazy.)

(Fourth Note: The only year on this list for which I have no films represented is 2020. I think something weird may have happened that year that stopped a lot of movies from coming out in the theaters.)

(Fifth Note: There is no fifth note. You are now free to view my list.)

100. Captain America: Civil War (Director: The Russo Brothers, 2016) – I understand that by putting this as the first movie on my list, I may be alienating film buffs right out of the gate. But my kids were young when the Marvel Avengers movies started coming out and I took them to all of them and enjoyed quite a few. This one, which pits two groups of Avengers against each other, is by far my favorite.

99. Spellbound (Director: Jeffrey Blitz, 2002) – This charming film, which follows a group of kids at the 1999 National Spelling Bee, is the first of four documentaries to appear on my list.

98. Nightcrawler (Director: Dan Gilroy, 2014)

97. Letters from Iwo Jima (Director: Clint Eastwood, 2006)

96. Win Win (Director: Tom McCarthy, 2011)

95. A Quiet Place (Director: Jon Krasinski, 2018) – As a horror movie lover, I have high standards for films from this genre and don’t just like any old guts and gore flick that hits the theater. All eight horror films that made this list stand out as being unique and/or innovative within the genre, and this is no exception. It’s certainly not the first movie where the characters have to remain silent so the monsters won’t hear them, but it may be the first movie that I’m aware of that builds its entire premise on that nuance.

94. Stranger Than Fiction (Director: Marc Foster, 2006)

93. The Disaster Artist (Director: James Franco, 2017)

92. A Complete Unknown (Director: James Mangold, 2024)

91. Selma (Director: Ava DuVernay, 2014)

90. Elephant (Director: Gus Van Sant, 2003) – This haunting, dreamlike film that follows high school students on an ordinary day that turns horrific is definitely not for everyone, but I only viewed it once when it first came out and it has stuck with me for the last two decades.  

89. Philomena (Director: Stephen Frears, 2013)

88. Brooklyn (Director: John Crowley, 2015)

87. The Shape of Water (Director: Guillermo del Toro, 2017)

86. The Martian (Director: Ridley Scott, 2015)

85. Thirteen (Director: Catherine Hardwicke, 2003)

84. Grizzly Man (Director: Werner Herzong, 2005, NYT- 98) – The first of the films on my list to also appear on the New York Times list, this documentary is a fascinating character study of someone whose unique obsession with grizzly bears made him oblivious to the danger he put himself and others in. Another film not for the faint of heart.

83. Everything is Illuminated (Director: Liev Schrieber, 2005)

82. Blinded by the Light (Director: Gurinder Chadha, 2019) – I will admit that this film is a bit schmaltzy and/or hokey at times, but as a diehard Bruce Springsteen fan, I couldn’t help but love this movie based on the real life story of a Pakistani teen in England in the 1980s who finds meaning and direction in his life through the music of The Boss. 

81. No Country for Old Men (Directors: The Coen Brothers, NYT- 6)

80. 127 Hours (Director: Danny Boyle, 2010)

79. The Wolf of Wall Street (Director: Martin Scorsese, 2013, NYT- 20)

78. Kill Bill, Vol. 2 (Director: Quentin Tarantino, 2004) – The first of three Tarantino film to appear on this list, the first volume will show up much further down. And while I didn’t like this one quite as much as the first, it did provide a fantastically satisfying conclusion to this tale.

77. Inception (Director: Christopher Nolan, 2010, NYT- 55)

76. The Banshees of Inisherin (Director: Martin McDonagh, 2022)

75. Toy Story 3 (Director: Lee Unkrich, 2010) – The first of four animated movies on this list, Toy Story is the rare series that managed to put out multiple sequels as good as the original.

74. Get Out (Director: Jordan Peele, 2017, NYT- 8) – With this film, writer/director Jordan Peele, previously known to the world as a sketch comedy master, managed to emerge out of nowhere as a horror master, with one of the most unique horror films of all time. All of the performances were great, but Catherine Keener was so good, I don’t know if I can ever see her again without a shiver going up my spine.

73. Argo (Director: Ben Affleck, 2012)

72. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (Director: Michael Gondry, 2004, NYT- 7)

71. Super Size Me (Director: Morgan Spurlock, 2004) – In some ways this is less of a documentary than a reality show, as our fearless director goes on an amusing journey to see what happens if he eats nothing but McDonalds for an entire month. Normally documentaries are nowhere near this fun.

70. Little Miss Sunshine (Director: Jonathan Dayton, 2006, NYT- 63)

69. The Imitation Game (Director: Morten Tyldum, 2014)

68. Green Book (Director: Peter Farrelly, 2018)

67. Super 8 (Director: J.J. Abrams, 2011) – I was unexpectedly charmed by this sci-fi, action, thriller that harkens back to early-80s Spielberg.

66. Frost/Nixon (Director: Ron Howard, 2008)

65. Cinderella Man (Director: Ron Howard, 2005) – I didn’t plan to put two Ron Howard films back-to-back, it just ended up happening that way. And there will be yet another of his films coming up later! (Note- Ron Howard is one of only three directors—along with Tarantino and Spielberg—who have three films on my list. Surprised myself with that one.)

64. Big Fish (Director: Tim Burton, 2003)

63. Unfaithful (Director: Adrian Lynne, 2002)

62. Lion (Director: Garth Davis, 2016)

61. Adaptation (Director: Spike Jonze, 2002, NYT- 27) – While this film was directed by Spike Jonze, I really think of it as the work of screenwriter Charlie Kaufman whose absurd comic genius was first seen in 1999 with Being John Malkovich. With Adaptation, Kaufman takes his absurdity to joyous, dizzying heights as he incorporates himself and his fictional twin brother into the plot of the movie.

60. Shrek (Directors: Andrew Adamson, Vicky Jenson, 2001)

59. Hidden Figures (Director: Theodore Melfi, 2016)

58. The Substance (Director: Coralie Fargeat, 2024) – One of the oddest entries into the horror genre in recent memory, film and/or horror buffs will observe that director Fargeat pays homage to many other directors in her film, including Stanley Kubrick, David Cronenberg, John Carpenter, and Darren Aronofsky, to name a few. And while the ending is a bit over the top and will leave some looking for the nearest barf bag, I thoroughly enjoyed the stylized filmmaking and Demi Moore’s unhinged performance.

57. The King’s Speech (Director: Tom Hooper, 2010)

56. The Hurt Locker (Director: Kathryn Bigelow, 2008, NYT- 68)

55. The Others (Director: Alejandro Amenabar, 2001)

54. Drive My Car (Director: Ryusuke Hamaguchi, 2021)

53. American Splendor (Director: Shari Springer Berman, 2003) – Half documentary, half biopic, Paul Giamatti turns in a brilliant performance as underground comic book writer Harvey Pekar, who also appears in the film to comment on being portrayed in the film. Very unique ride.

52. Rise of the Planet of the Apes (Director: Rupert Wyatt, 2011) – As a huge fan of the original Planet of the Apes series, I decided to checkout this reboot and was completely amazed at how good it was. Providing a completely new spin on the rise of an ape planet, this flick gives a seemingly plausible explanation of how such a phenomenon could even happen under the guise of Alzheimer’s drug research gone awry. I like this movie so much, I rewatch it about once a year.

51. CODA (Director: Sian Heder, 2021)

50. The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Rings (Director: Peter Jackson, 2001, NYT- 87) – I’m not generally a huge fan of the sword and sorcery genre (I’ve never watched an episode of Game of Thrones, nor do I have any interest) but I did find the first film of Jackson’s trilogy quite engaging and there was a scene towards the end of the film that was one of the best battle sequences I’ve ever seen. The subsequent two films all kind of mesh together in my mind, but the first one stands out for me, meriting its place on my list.

49. In Bruges (Director: Martin McDonagh, 2008)

48. Lost in Translation (Director: Sophia Coppola, 2003, NYT- 30) – This is such a unique, wistful, stylish film. It may be Bill Murray’s best dramatic performance, and it provided a launching pad for Scarlett Johansson’s career. It’s just a beautiful slice of life film.

47. Whiplash (Director: Damien Chazelle, 2014, NYT- 60)

46. Million Dollar Baby (Director: Clint Eastwood, 2004)

45. Gladiator (Director: Ridley Scott, 2000, NYT- 92)

44. Munich (Director: Steven Spielberg, 2005)

43. Godzilla Minus One (Director: Takashi Yamazaki, 2023) – Normally I wouldn’t go into a Godzilla movie expecting it to be a great piece of art, but by the time I got around to watching it, I had heard so many rave reviews, I had extremely high expectations. Going into a film that way is sometimes a recipe for disaster, as it’s difficult to match such high expectations, but amazingly, this film actually surpassed them. Far from being just another giant monster movie, this is a human story of how a Japanese soldier tries to pick up the pieces of his shattered life after the end of WWII. And oh yes, he happens to have to deal with a giant lizard in the midst of that.

42. Mullholland Drive (Director: David Lynch, 2001, NYT- 2)

41. Past Lives (Director: Celine Song, 2023, NYT- 86)

40. Brokeback Mountain (Director: Ang Lee, 2005, NYT- 17)

39. WALL-E (Director: Andrew Stanton, 2008, NYT- 34) – My wife estimates that this is the movie she has watched most in her life because our oldest son, who was two when it came out, constantly wanted to watch the DVD. And while she certainly watched it more than I, because she was home during the day while I was at work, I’m sure it’s very close to the top of my most viewed list, as well. While many kids’ movies grow tiresome on repeated viewings, this was one I was always happy to turn on. If you told me before I first watched it that I would love a movie about two robots falling in love in outer space, I would think you were insane, but WALL-E is tough not to love. We watched the DVD so much, it eventually stopped working and we had to get a new one.

38. The Pianist (Director: Roman Polanski, 2002)

37. Birdman or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance) (Director: Alejandro G. Inarritu, 2014)

36. About a Boy (Directors: The Weitz Brothers, 2002)

35. Lincoln (Director: Steven Spielberg, 2012) – Is Daniel Day-Lewis ever anything short of amazing in any film he’s ever been in? The answer is “No.” There is an argument to be made for him as the greatest living actor and his portrayal of Abraham Lincoln only strengthens that argument.

34. Pan’s Labyrinth (Director: Guillermo del Toro, 2006, NYT- 54) Guillermo del Toro’s films always have a magical quality to them, and this one in particular is like watching a dazzling, technicolor dream come to life.

33. Shaun of the Dead (Director: Edgar Wright, 2004) This is one of two films on my list that I am kind of amazed didn’t end up on the NYT list. While most of the movies on the NYT list are serious, critically acclaimed films, there are a handful of silly, but notable, comedies sprinkled throughout. Movies like Superbad, Anchorman, and Bridesmaids appear on the list, presumably as comedic cultural touchstone type flicks, but I think that Shaun of the Dead is funnier and more culturally significant than all of those, as it is perhaps the quintessential horror-comedy film.

32. A Beautiful Mind (Director: Ron Howard, 2001)

31. Les Miserables (Director: Tom Hooper, 2012)

30. Juno (Director: Jason Reitman, 2007)

29. The Wrestler (Director: Darren Aronofsky, 2003) – Yeah, I’m the guy who has to name drop, so I am compelled to mention here that I went to Junior High School with Darren Aronofsky, so I knew him “back in the day.” But that’s not the reason I put this movie on my list. Darren has directed some very unique films, and while Black Swan is the one that ended up on the NYT list, and it is certainly very good in its own right, I happen to prefer this tale of a washed up wrestler, which I would argue is Mickey Rourke’s greatest screen performance.

28. Searching for Sugar Man (Director: Malik Bendjelloul, 2012) – This film, which won the Oscar for Best Documentary, tells the inspiring story of how washed-up Detroit folk singer, Sixto Rodriguez experienced a sudden resurgence due to his incredible popularity in South Africa. It’s a fascinating documentary and Sixto’s music, which I had never previously heard of, is great, so I was glad to pick up his CD after watching the flick.

27. 500 Days of Summer (Director: Marc Webb, 2009)

26. Traffic (Director: Steven Soderbergh, 2000)

25. Train to Busan (Director: Sang-ho Yeon, 2016) – This Korean horror flick, has at its core, a tender story of a man trying to connect with his young daughter after a recent divorce. The fact that while he is trying to do this a zombie apocalypse suddenly breaks out, just complicates things, as you might imagine.

24. O Brother, Where Art Thou? (Directors: The Coen Brothers, 2000, NYT- 76) – My oldest son’s favorite film, I believe it is George Clooney’s best comic turn. That Clooney’s madcap, depression-era adventure occurs with John Turturro and Tim Blake Nelson by his side only makes the movie that much more hilarious.

23. The Artist (Director: Michel Hazanavicius, 2011)

22. Hotel Rwanda (Director: Terry George, 2004)

21. Chocolat (Director: Lasse Hallstrom, 2000)

20. Serenity (Director: Joss Whedon, 2005) – The greatest thing my brother-in-law ever did for me was insist that I see this movie. A film based on the television show Firefly, which I had not even heard of at the time, Serenity is an action, sci-fi, western, comedy that had me at the edge of my seat the entire time. My movie-watching experience was also helped by the fact that I saw it on my 36^th birthday and happened to be the only person in the theater, so it was like I was having my own personal screening. One of the best movie-going experiences of my life.

19. American Fiction (Director: Cord Jefferson, 2023)

18. Memento (Director: Christopher Nolan, 2000, NYT- 62)

17. Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon (Director: Ang Lee, 2000, NYT- 16) This sprawling, beautifully shot film represents the first time I saw a martial arts movie that was clearly a work of art. Maybe there were others that pre-dated it, and there were several that came after that were also quite good, but this one is my favorite in this genre.

16. La La Land (Director: Damien Chazelle)

15. Let the Right One In (Director: Tomas Alfredson, 2008, NYT- 70) – The highest rated horror movie on my list, this Swedish film that tells the tale of a bullied pre-teen boy who befriends a girl seemingly his age, who turns out to be not as human as she appears, may be the best vampire film of the past 50 years, let alone the 21^st century.

14. Jojo Rabbit (Director: Taika Waititi, 2019)

13. 12 Years a Slave (Director: Steve McQueen, 2013, NYT- 51)

12. Catch Me If You Can (Director: Steven Spielberg, 2002)

11. Almost Famous (Director: Cameron Crowe, 2000, NYT- 47)

10. Yesterday (Director: Danny Boyle, 2019) – While this fantastical film about a world in which the Beatles have mysteriously disappeared in the minds of all but a few people may not technically be Boyle’s best work, it is definitely my favorite. Certainly, having a love for the Fab Four helps in appreciating the movie, but that aside, the main character is immensely likeable and the whole story is quite charming.

9.  Sideways (Director: Alexander Payne, 2004) – Paul Giamatti is one of these actors who always enhances any film he’s in, so when he manages to get into a film that already has a clever and witty story line, stunning cinematography and a great supporting cast, the result is nothing short of spectacular.

8. The Incredibles (Director: Brad Bird, 2004) – Not only my favorite animated film of the 21^st century, but of all time, this quirky inside look at the lives of superheroes when they are off the clock is endlessly fun and never gets old, no matter how many times I watch it. And that’s good, since like WALL-E, it’s another flick that we watched constantly with our kids when they were little.

7. Borat (Director: Larry Charles, 2006, NYT- 53) – One of the funniest movies of all time, I was not familiar with Sacha Baron Cohen prior to seeing this in the theater, which was probably a good thing, since I had no idea what to expect. I was laughing so hard while watching this movie, I was actually in pain and, in fact, missed many lines while I was trying to compose myself. But luckily, on my second viewing, I was able to catch what I missed. Niiiiiiiiice.

6. 1917 (Director: Sam Mendes, 2019) – One of the best war movies I’ve ever seen, having filmed it essentially, as one long continuous shot, created a sense of realism and urgency that is rarely captured on screen.

5. Kill Bill, Vol. 1 (Director: Quentin Tarantino, 2003, NYT- 61) – Tarantino decided to take the zany, over-the-top approach of a violent Looney Tunes episode and imbed it into a Live Action film. The result is heart-pounding action, silly gore and endless fun.

4. Poor Things (Director: Yorgos Lanthimos, 2023) – This is the other film on my list that I am kind of shocked didn’t end up on the NYT list. Maybe because it’s too new? Maybe because it’s too bizarre? Maybe because there are too many uncomfortable moments? No matter the reason, I think it is one of the most inventive films I’ve ever seen, on top of being visually stunning, and featuring a performance by Emma Stone that is nothing short of brilliant.

3. Inglorious Basterds (Director: Quentin Tarantino, 2009, NYT- 14) – This reimagining of events during WWII, depicting a specialized team of soldiers tasked with hunting down and killing Adolf Hitler, features a plethora of great performances, including the one by Christoph Waltz that won him an Oscar for Best Supporting Actor. You don’t generally think of movies about Nazis as being fun, but this one definitely was.

2. Amelie (Director: Jean-Pierre Jeunet, 2001, NYT- 41) – Audrey Tautou imbues the title character of this film with a combination of charm, whimsy, and mischief that I have never seen on screen before or since. If watching this movie doesn’t bring you joy, I suggest going to see a cardiologist, because your heart may be frozen.

1. Parasite (Director: Bong Joon Ho, 2019, NYT- 1) – It’s interesting that my #1 film of the century is the same as the NYT choice. I guess it must mean that it really is the best movie of the past 25 years. Of course this is all subjective, but honestly this Korean thriller-comedy is about as riveting a theater going experience as one can ever hope for. A few gruesome moments may be off-putting for some, but the film is so well-done, with some truly jaw-dropping plot turns, that it is hard not to appreciate this great piece of art by Bong Joon Ho.